Conefusionism

A conceptual look at safety from the point of view of Cone, a humble traffic cone.

Since his youthful days in the early 1900s, Cone has been obsessed with safety. He’s like a vigilant guardian, always on the lookout for lurking dangers, ready to spring into action to shield others from harm’s way. Cone’s bravery often leads him to confront peril head-on, willingly putting himself in harm’s path!

However, lately, Cone’s journey has hit a rough patch. As his physical form shifted from rubber to plastic over the years, so too did his emotional landscape. The values he once held dear and the social norms he adhered to have undergone a profound evolution.

In this modern era, the concept of ‘safety’ has taken on new dimensions. It’s not just about physical protection anymore; now, it encompasses psychological well-being. Trust, empathy, and open communication are the cornerstones of this newfound definition. Cone finds himself grappling with how to navigate this shifting paradigm.

Each week brings with it a fresh wave of existential ponderings for Cone. As he delves deeper into the intricacies of empathy and explores his feminine side, he immerses himself in a myriad of experiences, contemplating his place in the grand tapestry of existence. It dawns on him that his impact on the vast world around him may be but a mere ripple in the ocean of life, but that the should still try. Thus, he christens his quest ‘Conefusionism’.

Conefusionism (cone-fused with-onism and cone + confusion), a fusion of Cone’s essence with the existential concept of Onism, encapsulates his philosophy (Onism is the distress we feel upon realizing how little of the world we will experience, being stuck in just one body that inhabits only one place at a time). Conefusionism is a rallying cry against the trivialities of existence, urging one to seize the moment and embrace life’s complexities.

Along his journey, Cone has formulated the five tenets of Conefusionism:

  1. Dare to think unsafely: Push the boundaries of conventional wisdom, dare to question the status quo, and explore uncharted territories of thought and action.
  2. Embrace purpose: Infuse every moment with meaning, no matter how seemingly insignificant, and leave an indelible mark on the world.
  3. Revel in the ordinary: Find beauty in the mundane, savor the simple pleasures of everyday life, and take time to appreciate the wonders that surround you.
  4. Cherish connections: Treasure the bonds of friendship, camaraderie, and love, and never take the presence of loved ones for granted.
  5. Honour differences: Embrace the richness of differing perspectives and strive to understand and respect the myriad ways in which individuals experience the world.

As the tenets of Conefusionism have gained traction, a global movement has been born. Its influence stretches far and wide, transcending borders and uniting individuals from all walks of life in their quest for meaning and fulfillment.

The Adventures of Cone

  • Plucky Cone

    Plucky Cone

    Cone bravely faces the danger of accessing alternate universes through an ethereal portal.

  • Thrilled Cone

    Thrilled Cone

    Cone is practically bouncing with excitement over his new toy from Amazon.

  • Artisan Cone

    Artisan Cone

    Cone pumps some weights, flexes, and gets fired up to measure baking ingredients for sCones!

  • Grounded Cone

    Grounded Cone

    Cone tries to get rooted by staring up at the tree branches.

  • Grassy Cone

    Grassy Cone

    Cone smoked so much weed that he sprouted a wild and frizzy hairstyle naturally.

  • Chaotic Cone

    Chaotic Cone

    Cone figures his life is a character trapped in one long film noir.

  • Disconsolate Cone

    Disconsolate Cone

    Cone starts digging his way to Australia to see a cute wallaby, but gives up almost instantly.

  • Psychedelic Cone

    Psychedelic Cone

    Cone takes LSD to experience something profound but just ends up in a vortex.

  • Mindful Cone

    Mindful Cone

    Cone tries to connect with his mental well-being by reclining on a comfy couch.

  • Considerate Cone

    Considerate Cone

    Cone wonders whether dressing up to play rhinos and hippos is cultural appropriation.

  • Adventurous Cone

    Adventurous Cone

    Cone has been so grounded for so long that he feels the urge to throw caution to the wind.

  • Shaky Cone

    Shaky Cone

    Cone climbs the ladder of success… only to find it wobbles.

  • Non-judgmental Cone

    Non-judgmental Cone

    Cone tries to broaden his perspective by discussing the pros and cons of smooth versus hairy bodies with Sheep.

  • Tired Cone

    Tired Cone

    Cone lays down his sweet and weary head, as the sun sinks low in the Western sky.

  • Nervous Cone

    Nervous Cone

    Cone realizes that he is too chicken to cross the road.

  • Raised Cone

    Raised Cone

    Cone elevates his watchfulness to test whether mobility improves vigilance.

  • Amazed Cone

    Amazed Cone

    Cone is shocked that the radioactive hazard symbol uses abstracted safety cones in the graphic.

  • Theatrical Cone

    Theatrical Cone

    Cone is thrilled to introduce the dramatic live-stage performance of ‘Roads Less Travelled’ at The Loading Dock Theatre.

  • Disoriented Cone

    Disoriented Cone

    Cone jumps around during a long exposure photograph but gets dizzy and wobbly in the process.

  • Unsettled Cone

    Unsettled Cone

    Cone, upon reflection, feels a bit divided.

  • Campaigning Cone

    Campaigning Cone

    Cone, building on the success of the Free The Vagina movement, starts campaigning to free the urethra.

  • Lazy Cone

    Lazy Cone

    Cone parties all night and wakes up hungover, rumpled, and disheveled.

  • Responsible Cone

    Responsible Cone

    Cone feels it is his duty as a safety officer to stand in for Exit Sign at the local Friday night rave.

  • Affectionate Cone

    Affectionate Cone

    Cone finds spooning with Tracker Loader Backhoe pleasant enough, but not terribly intimate.

  • Enlightened Cone

    Enlightened Cone

    Cone feels an acute need to join the tri-angulati society to covertly oppose all vehicles of oppression and obtuse thought.

  • Unimpressed Cone

    Unimpressed Cone

    Cone tries outside-the-box thinking but finds it overrated.

  • Demoralized Cone

    Demoralized Cone

    Cone finds it disheartening to be enveloped by so much negative space.

  • Surrealist Cone

    Surrealist Cone

    Cone channels the space between wake and sleep to actualize his unconscious Daliesque dreamstate.

  • Self-reliant Cone

    Self-reliant Cone

    Cone is working on creating one more diagonal line inside his body so that he can hug and kiss himself.

  • Sheepish Cone

    Sheepish Cone

    Cone stares into a funhouse mirror and suddenly understands emotional eating.